The Art of Nerdiness

When most people think about nerds, geeks, dweebs, etc., they picture people with huge glasses, buck teeth, and extreme social awkwardness. While there are some nerds that may fit this description to a “T,” there are plenty of them out there that carry themselves with the same confidence that other people have. If you want to get out there in the dating world or just the world in general, you may want to avoid the stereotypical nerdy awkwardness. The tips below are designed to turn you from klutz to CIA agent in no time at all. Read on to see how you can avoid being awkward in a crowd.

Have a Grip on Reality

You can be cool and nerdy at the same time. You don’t have to be completely disconnected from reality. When you have conversations with “normal” people, try to relate to “normal” topics of conversation – sports, politics, TV shows, music, etc. You don’t have to turn every conversation you have into a Star Trek trivia session. Try to get in touch with the regular guy or girl in you, and let the public see that person from time to time. You can save the blatant nerdiness for times when it’s truly applicable.

Build up Your Confidence

Have you ever noticed that the guy in the room surrounded by woman is the one that walks like he owns the place? That’s because confidence is enticing, exciting, exhilarating, and any other “e” adjective you can think of. Cockiness can be a turn off, but confidence is magnetic. If you carry yourself well, people won’t think you’re awkward. Make every step as if you planned to make it, and let other people see that you are proud of who you are. Whatever awkwardness you once had will fade away in no time.

Practice Poise

A little poise can go a long way in getting rid of your awkwardness. This is different than confidence because it is a physical attribute. It doesn’t have much to do with how you think or feel like confidence would. Learn to sit up straight, walk with one foot in front of the other, cross your legs at the ankles, etc. If you can present yourself as a poised person, you will not look nearly as awkward as you probably do now. I have a really hard time with this because I’m naturally clumsy. Nevertheless, I fight through it, and so can you.

Find a Role Model

You don’t have to find an actual role model to work with, but you should find someone to inspire your lack of awkwardness. This could be someone you actually know, or it could be someone you have seen on TV. For instance, you may want to carry yourself like your best friend or student body president. You may prefer to carry yourself like Tyra Banks or George Clooney. Whatever the case may be, it would be nice to have someone to watch over that you can mimic in your journey. Look around for a good role model, and you’ll be un-awkward in no time.

You can be a nerd without being an embarrassment to the people around you. Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory is awkward, as is Rajesh Koothrappali, Howard Wolowitz, and Leonard Hofstadter. You don’t want to be like those guys. Think of the not-so-awkward nerds from Glee. That’s what you want to aim for. Practice the tips above, and you’ll be on your way to a normal/nerdy life in no time.

For some reason, most people define a nerd by his software developer career or his comic book collection. They don’t think of geeks as real people that like to socialize, date, and party just like anyone else. If you are a nerd, this may leave you feeling like you have no hope of finding someone relatively attractive to date. The dating process is scary for everyone, but it can be especially scary for those who don’t exactly ooze poise and suaveness. Nerds can date hotties too though, as long as they have the right “moves” to work with. Here are some tips to help you snag the best looking person in the room the next time you hit the dating scene.

Nerdy Sophistication

There is a difference between being a nerd and being a smart guy with nerdy hobbies. If you are blatantly discussing your nerdy habits from the moment you go on a date, you may have a hard time catching a hottie to call your own. If you can show a “normal” side to yourself initially, you can slowly work in your nerdiness over time. My husband is one of the coolest people I know, but he also as a passion for collecting Yu-Gi-Oh cards and playing Grepolis online. These are “nerdy” hobbies, but you would never know that he had them because he is so sophisticated most of the time. I’m not saying I’m a hottie or anything, but I can tell you that I may have avoided getting with him if he didn’t have that sophisticated edge. It’s just something to keep in mind when you go out for a date.

Nerdy Hotness

You don’t have to date a bimbo to date someone attractive. There are plenty of really stunning nerds out there just waiting to be with someone like you. I had a friend who was captain of the cheerleading team and homecoming queen, and she was the biggest Star Wars fanatic in the world. People who knew her at school just saw her as this magnificent goddess of some sort, but I saw her as a closet nerd begging to show the world her true passions. Long story short, you can find a hot nerd to be with. You just have to look around for him or her.

Nerdy Similarities

At the end of the day, you are going to need to find someone who shares common interests with you. If that person happens to be really attractive, so be it. There is no rule book that says a hot person and a nerd cannot share the same interests in life. You just have to get to know someone enough to see if you connect with him or her. You may have more in common with the proverbial “popular kids” than you realized. You won’t know that until you get out in the real world and start talking to people outside of your normal clique.

In my opinion, nerds and hotties were meant to be together. That way they can procreate and have these gorgeous, brilliant babies that rule the world. Perhaps I am getting a little ahead of myself though. Let’s just go with the fact that nerds can date hotties and see what happens from there. Don’t get discouraged by rejection because it very well may happen. Pick up the pieces, brush them off, and get right back out there. I guarantee there is a hottie somewhere out there just waiting for you to come and get her.

Being smart sucks sometimes. Sure, there are tons of perks that come along with intelligence, but there is also the pressure of containing your rude thoughts in a sea of stupid people. I’m not the smartest person in the world, but I can certainly hold my own in a battle of wits. I find it really hard not to just go off on someone when he or she asks a stupid question. The person who said “There is no such thing as a stupid question” was a total idiot himself/herself.

In any event, this raises the need to contain your intellectual confidence so that it does not come across as arrogance. That could make a lot of people mad in a short period of time. Here are some tips to help you contain yourself enough to fit in with the rest of the world.

Don’t Be Condescending

If you know that you are dealing with someone who is not quite as smart as you are, you cannot let that person know what you are thinking. One easy way to control this is to avoid being condescending. You know, that’s when you talk down to a person like he or she doesn’t know what you are talking about, even if that is not necessarily the case. That sentence could be considered a form of condescension. I explained a concept that you probably already knew about in a way that made you feel like I was calling you stupid. You can’t put those feelings onto other people.

Don’t Correct Other People

People are going to make grammar and factual mistakes around you. That is just the result of our education system being put to good use. (yes, that was sarcasm Sheldon) You may be really tempted to correct people when they make a mistake, but you just have to roll with it. If you do correct the person, do so in a subtle way. Rather than acting like you are the only person that can be right in the world, try making a suggestion that sounds almost hypothetical. “I always thought that such and such happened at bla bla bla time, not…” You could even finish that off with “I could be wrong though.” If you learn how to correct people in a nice way, they won’t get mad at you for sharing your opinion.

Don’t Judge

It is really easy to cast judgment on someone who is not as smart as you are. You can make fun of his or her lifestyle or look down upon his or her decisions. At the end of the day though, doing something like that is just going to make you look like an asshole. You can’t analyze every person you meet like an FBI agent. That will leave you alone in no time. Try to be a little open minded, even if it kills you. You might be able to analyze a person’s character from the second you see him or her, but you can’t let anyone else know that. Just keep your thoughts to yourself and give people a chance. They may end up surprising you.

Final Thoughts

Being intelligent isn’t a bad thing, but it isn’t something you should flaunt to every person you come across. If you are really as smart as you think you are, people will be able to tell. You just have to carry yourself with intellectual confidence without coming across as cocky. Practice this in your own life, and you’ll see what I mean. I have been treading this thin line for years now, and I have seen what happens on both sides of it. You need to be on the good side, okay?

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